S0-001 The Fall of the House of Wunderbred
The Fall of the House of Wundbred is the first live show and first episode of season 0 of Queens of Adventure. The live show was performed at Timbre Room in Seattle. Synopsis At a local inn, four drag queen adventures, Arson Nicki, Butylene O'Kipple, Fraya Love, and Harlotte O'Scara, are approached by a man named Copper Top, who hires them to perform a show at an annual event. Upon accepting, he chauffeurs the party to the House of Wunderbred in a carriage pulled by a capybara of unusual size. They arrive at a large manor, that looks like it was once great, but has grown quite shabby, and are shown to a dressing room. There is a portrait in the room (that Arson sniffs, finding it smells disgusting), and four vanities. Butylene discovers a book, The Rise and Fall of the Great Houses, in a drawer, and Fraya tries to deep-throat a wooden banana. Lady Edith Wunderbred, their employer, arrives and the queens introduce themselves. They head for the stage and the dressing room door locks behind them. Edith sits in the audience obscured by stage lights. Around the stage are two mannequins wearing wigs and several loose clumps of hair on the floor. Arson pins four of the pink hair clumps to her head. Fraya slips on hair and knocks over a mannnequin. Butylene begins a dance and drinks a potion, which Harlotte threatens to steal. Arson then sets up a sling and Harlotte finds a way to join her. While appreciating their work so far, Lady Edith insists she wants to see the queens 'Slay' and the Mannequeen to stage left with a blue bob wig comes to life. During combat, Harlotte double attacks the Mannequeen, Fraya chucks a croquet mallet from the inactive manneguin she toppled. Butylene throws a bomb, which burns the mannequeen to ash, but the blue bob wig survives, undulating slowly. Arson's attack misses. Then, the hair clump tumbleweaves on her head come to life, forming a pink beehive hairdo blightwig squeezing her head. Harlotte shoots her bow at the inactive mannequeen which remains inactive. Fraya misses the blue wig with her trident. As the pink beehive grips tighter, Arson retaliates by casting Hideous Laughter on it. This amuses Edith, but she also feels this battle is taking too long, and says she is ready for her favorite part, "The Deathdrop", and the stage drops out from under the queens. Beneath the House of Wunderbred The queens and the disintegrating pieces of mannequeen fall into a water filled cistern which then flushes, sending them into an underground cavern where they land in a dumpster on the edge of the set of tracks through the tunnel. Fraya discovers a locket in the dumpster that feels warm when she puts it on and heals her slightly. The dumpster begins to move on the track, passing a mural that faintly glows. The track reaches a branch with debris on their side. Harlotte uses her bow to hit the track switch. Another track runs parallel. A dumpster with a green blightwig wearing mannequeen rides this rail. Arson casts eldritch b''last at the mannequeen with a limp wrist motion. Butylene's bomb misses, but Harlotte, manages to fire three arrows successfully. The green blightwig fires a tumbleweave into the party's cart while the mannequeen prepares to attack Fraya who ''Commands the mannnequeen to 'Implode'. The mannequeen is defeated. The queens notice their mine cart is getting close to a dead end. Arson tries to eldritch blast the next switch, but fails. A swarm of bats fly by, and one smacks Arson in the face. They are dumped from the dumpster. They land in a stark white room with no discernible light source and four stone eyes on one wall, four eye symbols on the floor, and a statue in the middle of the room. Harlotte investigates the statue. As her shadow covers a stone eye on the statue, it blinks open, but closes when she steps away. Edith's voice comes in and insults the queens and all shadows in the room elongate. Harlotte orders the queens to each stand on a floor symbol before something bad happens. She finds thieves cant that says "Shade always comes to get you in the End" on the base of the statue. The queens begin to throw shade at each other while standing on the floor mosaics. Their shadows grow and cover the stone eyes. Suddenly the shadows form into a giant monster which attacks them. The room grows dark as Edith's voice taunts them. The shadows roll poorly and miss the queens four times in a row. Arson casts dancing lights towards each of her queens. The Shade monster shrinks and is enraged. Harlotte lights a zippo self-lighting torch. The light dispels the Shade and the door opens. It leads into a closet of broken and discarded objects covered in dust. There is a slashed painting and a quiver of combustion arrows that Harlotte picks up. Butylene checks the painting. A young Edith is on one size, the other figure has been slashed out. Fraya recognizes the clothing as of an era older than the average life span of a High Elf like Edith. Exiting, they find a warmly lit library. Behind a desk is a gnome. He offers condolences for Lady Edith, explaining she is known to hold grudges, but offers to play a game. He will exchange reads with the queens, and if they land a good one, one that stings, on him, he will answer any question. Both Arson and Fraya's reads fail. Butylene's read makes him chuckle, and she asks him for mushrooms. The librarian finds mushrooms embedded in a scroll, and in the scroll are ingredients for a bomb. Harlotte performs a live sexy dance to try and intimidate the gnome, which arouses the gnome. She asks for the gem on top of the gnome's staff. He begrudgingly unscrews it and gives it to her. He then summons a portal which sends the party back to the stage. Behind the stage are displayed video highlights of the queens adventure, while in the audience Edith eats popcorn out of a golden chalice with chopsticks. She says it is getting late, but commands them to "Slay or be Slayed" and the various clumps of hair drag together mannequin parts to form a giant monster that Edith calls Lashes. Butylene attempts to cast Friendship against Lashes to attack Edith, which DM Matt allows under house rules at the cost of Inspiration. Lashes lumbers forward, colliding with an invisible barrier Edith calls the "Fourth Wall". Harlotte hides in the shadows. Arson casts poison spray at Lashes, breaking the friendship spell. Fraya calls upon her deity, Cher, and casts Detect Magic. ''There is no break in the force magic that makes up the Fourth Wall, but Fraya can see magic around Edith, around her Pomeranian, and most especially around Edith's Wig. A spray of acid from Butylene is more potent than expected, but Lashes then lashes out two wig tendrils at Fraya, narrowly missing her with one, hitting her with the other. Harlotte tries to find a gap to sneak into the audience, but fails, remaining hidden behind a fan. Edith shouts out that she can see Harlotte, and that her plan wont work. Arson is a little freaked out, and attacks with advantage with her short sword and sickle. Cashing in inspiration, Fraya summons ''Thunder Wave which does some damage to her friends, knocking Arson out, and a lot towards Lashes. The monster charges Butylene who implores Edith to use the yeast from the mushrooms to make her house rise again. Lady Edith, intrigued, suggests the entire party could be spared if they all agree to pledge themselves to her house. Butylene pledges herself. Lashes envelopes Fraya with hair, trapping her in its body. Harlotte makes two sneak attacks against Lashes with her combustion arrows, which infuriates Edith. Arson rolls her first saving throw. Fraya creates water to push against her Lashes prison, bursting apart the monster. Edith slow claps (despite her hands still holding her popcorn and chopsticks) and rises into the air. She congratulates them on defeating the practice monster and summons three new Lashes that combine into a Mega-Lashes. But the divine voice of Cher calls out from the locket Fraya found. "It's Showtime Girls" The locket triggers a glow and activates the stage equipment. The entire party is revived and healed while Edith and the monsters have frozen as the Queens perform a lipsynch. The power of the performance destroys lashes, and causes Edith's wig to stop glowing. She states that hatred was all that kept the house together. Now, her power dispelled, the house begins to collapse, knocking Edith out A chasm forms in the stage. Edith and the Pomeranian block the audience exit. Butylene sprints into the audience, the Fourth Wall broken. Harlotte follows, as does Fraya who throws her trident at Edith's wig. Arson heads towards the stage door. The Pomeranian looks between the party and its prone master, and nips Butylene. Arson tries to push down a barrier, and fails, so jumps the chasm, rejoining the party. Harlotte picks up the Pomeranian and rushes into the lobby, where there are jets of fire and another chasm. She clears this chasm, but the rest of the party dangles from the carpet into the chasm. Seeing her friends in distress, Harlotte turns, shouts "Kali Ma Shakte De!" and chucks the Pomeranian into the chasm, hoping the sacrifice will magically save her friends. A blast from the chasm does so. The four queens push open the door and escape. Outside they can see the librarian running away carrying a book of erotic orc sketches. They find themselves face to face with the Capybara, still pulling the cart, driven by a singed Copper Top. "So, how was the show?" Characters (All are Debuts unless otherwise noted) Party: * Arson Nicki - drow warlock * Butylene O'Kipple - tiefling alchemist * Fraya Love - water genasi cleric * Harlotte O'Scara - human rogue NPCs: * Copper Top * Lady Edith Wunderbred * Pomeranian * Gnomi Malone Monsters/Enemies: * Jeff and Cynthia (Mannequeens) * Blightwigs * Tumbleweaves * Shade Monster * Lashes Live Show Roles * DM Matt * Dice Boy Ian * DJ Robosex Homosex * Behind the Scenes help from DM James Episode Notes Lore * House of Wunderbred is one of the great houses of the Age of Queens, now fallen into shabby condition. * A mural beneath the Manor. It depicts women in colorful hair dancing, singing, distributing gifts to people. Another portion of the mural seems to show Wunderbred Manor with a tower rising behind it. The next portion is less bright, shows monster attacks, famine and death and the Manor is missing its tower in the fourth panel while the hair on the figures is no longer color but swirling shadows. * A powerful form of force magic called the Fourth Wall is used in the theater of House Wunderbred. Inspiration Earned * Arson: Pins four clumps of hair to her head. * Fraya: Clumsily falling, knocking over a mannequin. * Butylene: For her initial dance. * Harlotte: Attempting to steal Butylene's potion pouch. * Fraya: Attempting to cast 'Fresh Breath' at a wig monster. * Butylene: Screaming along with Fraya's singing locket. * Harlotte: Cantrip puns and later another for a wig pun. * Arson: 'Gestures' in order to summon her Dancing Lights. * Fraya: For singing "G*psies, Tramps, and Thieves" when spellcasting. Memorable Quotes * "My name is Arson and I come from the Underdark where I worship a spider goddess." Audience laughs. "Oh there's more!" - Arson Nicki * "Are You Just Figuring Out She's the Badguy?" - DM Matt * "Okay guys, we've got some Majora's Mask bullshit going on. We've gotta do this quick!" - Harlotte O'Scara * "Stoned? Stoned honey? I'd rather be plastered!" - Arson Nikki * "Darlings, don't you know you can't break the Fourth Wall?" - Edith Wunderbred * "Edith, from the House of Wunderbred. Please take these natural yeasts from these mushrooms and this scroll that I got from this guy down the hall. Use this yeast to make your house rise again!" - Butylene O'Kipple * "For centuries, hatred was all that was keeping this house together. I didn't hate that." - Edith Wunderbred References * Butylene references local Seattle show Bacon Strip and two other local queens during the manni-queen battle. * The time a goose smacked Fabio in the face. * Donkey Kong country rail tracks. * Majora's Mask * "Shade comes from reading" - references to Paris is Burning during the shade challenge. * RuPaul's Drag Race Reading Challenge from Season 2 - quoted during the shade challenge. * Chocobos. * Portrait of Dorian Gray * "Look How Orange You Look!" * Harry Potter * Dune * "Kali Ma Shakte De" from Indiana Jones * "Klatu Barada Nikto" from the Day the Earth Stood Still * "Sex" book by Madonna. Name That Tune * Harlotte hums a version of the "Final Fantasy battle victory" song after defeating the Shade. * Who Wears Short Shorts? by the Royal Teens * "Two Sisters" - no seriously, can anyone name that tune Harlotte references? * "Girl Talk" - Ultraviolet Sound * "I'll Be There For You" - theme from Friends by the Rembrandts * "G*psy, Tramps, and Thieves" - by Cher * "Bang, Bang (My Baby Shot Me Down)" by Cher * "Take Me Home" by Cher * "Tonight is What It Means to Be Young" - Streets of Fire (Finale Lip Synch) * "Thank You For Being a Friend" Behind the Queens * Butylene is the first queen to roll in the show, an investigation. * Harlotte rolls the first natural 20 of the show with her performance check getting into the sling with Arson. * This show was DM Matt's first time DMing a game, other than some test sessions of this adventure he had done on Discord with volunteers. * According to the Kickstarterversary Retrospective bonus episode, this adventure had several other scenes and challenges that were dropped for time. Matt and James have said some of them have shown up elsewhere. Category:Episodes Category:Live Shows Category:Season Zero